Tag Archives: overeaters

To blog or not to blog… That is the question…

2 Dec

After 5 meetings… Yesterday was my first official “start day” in OA 12 steps for my eating disorder. I have eliminated all sugar, flour, wheat, and binge eating from my life. Today I start weight training again. I now have the mental, emotional, spiritual, tools, steps, and the daily/weekly group support I need to change my life and my health for good. This much knowledge and daily/weekly support is something I have never had before so I am looking forward to the future! I did my “before” photos last night (I have gained all of my weight back+) but I am not sure if I should post the photos this time and do weekly posts and public “check ins” with you all. I am kind of embarrassed. You all have seen me do this every year now for the last 3 years or so and now I am really scared… Crazy “me” scared of posting things?!?!? Am I scared I will “publicly fail” again or am I scared of what my friends and family will think of me and that I am no longer inspiring people that I am just looking like a joke? Part of me wants to post and video blog and blog about this and share and inspire the masses who might also be going thru this or inspire those that need help to finally get help… and part of me wants to keep this private and be quiet. (so not like me) I even recently made my Facebook profile private and will soon be eliminating people in my friends list. (I really do not have almost 5,000 friends that need to see where I am and what I am doing all the time. <<<< But that is a separate topic I will discuss later… I got side tracked ok… The thing that is different about TODAY is that I am not doing this to be “perfect” or look good… I am doing it this time to FEEL GOOD, BE GOOD TO THOSE AROUND ME, and BE HEALTHY! I have spent the last many months being kinder to myself so my mindset is like it has never been before starting this repeated yet NEW journey. I know now that I have had a problem with binge eating that goes back sooooooo many years but I worked out 4 hours a day long ago and so you never saw the results of my sugar addiction and actions. If I continue down this path of binge eating and unhealthy behavior I will die… Period! So many Mary mind questions… ARGH! Any thoughts on this are appreciated as I grow with you and appreciate your knowledge as I work thru this process. Should I post about it in video and photo form? Take you on this journey with me? My head is spinning… Thank you! ❤ YOU! Mary Lou

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